파우스티나일기1권 입회에 관해서...7~9

Entrance into the Convent

7. From the age of seven, I experienced the definite call of God, the grace of a vocation to the religious life. It was in the seventh year of my life that, for the first time, I heard God’s voice in my soul; that is, an invitation to a more perfect life. But I was not always obedient to the call of grace. I came across no one who would have explained these things to me. 8 The eighteenth year of my life. An earnest appeal to my parents for permission to enter the convent. My parents’ flat refusal. After this refusal, I turned myself over to the vain things of life, paying no attention to the call of grace, although my soul found no satisfaction in any of these things. The incessant call of grace caused me much anguish; I tried, however, to stifle it with amusements. Interiorly, I shunned God, turning with all my heart to creatures. However, God’s grace won out in my soul. 9 Once I was at a dance [probably in Lodz] with one of my sisters. While everybody was having a good time, my soul was experiencing deep torments. As I began to dance.  I suddenly saw Jesus at my side, Jesus racked with pain, stripped of His clothing, all covered with wounds, who spoke these words to me: How long shall I put up with you and how long will you keep putting Me off? At that moment the charming music stopped, [and] the company I was with vanished from my sight; there remained Jesus and I. I took a seat by my dear sister, pretending to have a headache in order to cover up what took place in my soul. After a while I slipped out unnoticed, leaving my sister and all my companions behind and made my way to the Cathedral of Saint Stanislaus Kostka. 원장수녀님께서... 파우스티나수녀님처럼 확실하게 불러주시면 좋겠지만... 대부분의 부르심은 미풍처럼 다가온다고 하셨다. 하지만 모든 것을 버리고 떠나야(따르는게 아니라 떠나는 것.으로 느껴진다.)하는 사람의 입장에서는 하느님께서 확신을 주시길 바랄 뿐이다. obedient : 1. 순종하는, 고분고분한, 충실한 convent :  1. 수녀회 incessant : a. 끊임없는, 그칠 새 없는, 쉴새 없는 anguish : n. (심신의) 격통(激痛), 비통, 고뇌, 번민 stifle : 1 숨막히게 하다 2 <불평·감정 등을> 억누르다, 억제하다 interior : 1 안의 shun : 1 피하다, 멀리하다 win out : (속어) 완수하다. rack : 고문하다. cover up : 싸서 감추다, 모조리 덮어버리다